You Have a Responsibility to You
In July of 2023, I made the bold decision to resign from my 16 year teaching career and build my virtual assistant business from home full time. I knew down to my core that this was the right move for not only myself, but also for my family. Being a single mother of two boys, I can’t deny that there was skepticism from others, and for an outsider, this decision may be perceived as irresponsible. The decision I made was not only rooted in aligning with my life vision, but also made after months of careful consideration and planning. Despite the perspective of the skeptic, it has been the most responsible decision I could have made for myself and my family.
Although I spent a period of time working toward a minor in Elementary Education during my undergraduate years, I did not go into teaching right after college. In fact, I steered so far away from teaching after graduation. I dropped that minor without hesitation when I realized I was not matching the enthusiastic energy of my classmates all bubbling over with excitement sharing about their pre-practicum school site experiences. It wasn’t for me, my intuition was telling me, and I couldn’t force it.
It wasn’t until after graduation and several jobs in office settings that bored me to tears that I felt the push to pursue a career in education. I was working for a reading program company in a cubicle where I was so uninterested I took walks to the bathroom just to stay awake. My role was to coordinate professional development for teachers. When I was on calls, everything on the other end of the line sounded so much more exciting than what I was doing.
I felt the drain in my energy; it was my intuition again, and it was ready to guide me like it had done when I dropped that elementary education minor in college. So, I listened. I resigned from that job, and started taking intentional action steps to pursue a career in education. I applied to substitute teach, took required courses, and registered and studied for the licensure exams. I was energized again, and as soon as I made the decision to teach, everything seemed to fall into place with each intentional, focused action that I took.
I was a substitute teacher, then a paraprofessional and soon after, a classroom teacher. Eventually, I obtained my Masters degree in special education and all along, I was invested. This was the career path that was aligned with my vision and life goals…. That is, until it wasn’t.
The last teaching position that I held, a fourth grade teacher in an inclusion classroom in a suburban school, was my dream job 6 years ago. The application process was competitive, and the hiring committee was split between my endorsement and that of another candidate. It was intense, and In the end, the job was mine. And I knew it was the right next step on a path meant for me because it lit me up. I was excited to go to work. I didn’t wish my life away to Friday or the next vacation. I wanted to be there; that job pushed me out of my comfort zone in so many ways, and I wanted to learn and grow as an educator. The truth is, I did learn and grow.
But over the last few years, I kept feeling a push for something new. I would be in my classroom day after day, and I had a repeating thought: “I know I am good at my job, and I do it well, but I don’t like it.” It became more about going through the motions. I no longer felt the excitement I once did. And I could feel it in my entire body. Once upon a time, this was my dream job, but then it became something I dreaded. And as time went on, I felt more and more like a caged bird.
I always feel compelled to say, it was never about the students or the families. I enjoyed building relationships. Each year families entrusted their children with me, to care for their academic, social and emotional needs, and I do not take that privilege lightly. There was so much about teaching that I truly loved.
We experienced changes in education, curriculum and procedures I could not support, and while I grasped so tightly to the little autonomy I had left, it was still taken from my colleagues and me. And what’s worse, there is no respectful recognition or compensation for a job well done in education.
The bottom line is I was unhappy and that unhappiness was quickly turning into misery. And I know that the definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over and expecting a different outcome. I couldn’t do it anymore. Venting and commiserating with my colleagues became less about problem solving and more about trauma dumping on one another. It was all so incredibly draining.
I was at another crossroads in my life, and I knew I could trust myself and my intuition. It was my intuition that led me on the path to a career in education, and it was also my intuition that guided me to find a way out.
Over 16 years ago, I did my research, made a plan and took the action steps to build my career in education. I am methodical in that way. Here I am again, doing the research, taking action and building again. This time, I’m building something that is mine, something of which I am incredibly proud.
Is this easy??? Nope! But I go through my days as a professional and as a mother with ease. I can not even begin to put into words how much happier I feel in this life. I am typing this from the hockey rink parking lot, and I just had a conversation with my 13 year old son. I shared a bit about this post with him and just how much happier I am.
I said, “It’s Friday night, and I am not at all agitated or stressed about being at the rink for 3 hours.”
He responded, “You would have been.”
My children see the change in me, and our family is better for it. I am teaching my boys so much about making decisions that allow you to live in alignment.
We all deserve a life we can be proud of, and the steps we take, how we get there, may look different, but I know for certain that the most responsible thing you can do is honor your truth. That’s when everything falls into place.